Relationship Management

Dear Friends,

Several months ago, a friend of mine came to me for help in dealing with her relationships. She felt too easily frustrated with her friends and family and was concerned that her anger flared sometimes over things that weren't really important. She wasn't happy with her relationships and didn't know what to do about it. We talked about general things we can all do to improve our relationships, be it with family, friends, and coworkers, or even people we have regular contact with, but don't know well, such as the local shopkeepers etc.

I gave her a few tips on finding happiness and fulfillment in relationships that I want to pass along to you as well. The most important point is to be aware of and look for the good in others, as this helps us temper our reactions when others may err or upset us in some way. Next, choose to see the best possible relationship with them in your mind. You can actually visualize your relationship with others in a positive light. And believe it or not, when you do visualize good interactions in your relationships with people, good interactions tend to follow suit.

Another suggestion for turning less than stellar relationships into better relationships is taking your demeanor into account. People respond better to someone who smiles frequently and has a good attitude than to someone who always seems to have a dark cloud over their head. I know this last suggestion may be difficult to pull off if you are around people you feel bring you down. However, I try to think about it this way—when you look down, you bring others down, and they in turn bring you down. So, in order to break this downward spiral, you can be the one who enlivens everyone with a more positive attitude and sincere smiles.

And finally, I encouraged her to find the joys in the most simple interactions with family, friends and coworkers. Shared secrets, silly jokes, picnics in the park, or watching the stars at night are all ways to draw closer to others. Needless to say, she had some work to do when I saw her that first time, but the last time I heard from her, she reported that she and her family members were getting along much better and that she had a very happy and fulfilling relationship with a new boyfriend that was going very well.

Relationships are a powerful and important part our lives and we have to do our part to keep them lively and fulfilling. If you are feeling less than satisfied with any of your personal relationships, perhaps you will give these tips a try.

With regards till next time.